Warlord of Mars #8 (Dynamite Entertainment): A retelling of the original Edgar Rice Burroughs Story "A Princess of Mars" and starring John Carter, I had high hopes for this series and I was pleasently rewarded. Issue 8 continues the quality art and excellent storytelling from the previous issues. I didn't care for the covers for this issue but that doesn't at all effect my rating of the issue itself. Granted this is just a retelling of previously written story, however the storyboarding was chosen well and action sequences are spot on. I have no complains about this book thus far. If you have yet to experience any of Burroughs works, this would be one that is the most easily accessible and would be a great intro into his writings.
Zatanna #15 (DC Comics): I actually enjoyed this issue. It was a fast paced oneshot which had Zatanna on the run from a hit squad who had gotten the better of her. It wrapped up quickly without loose ends. My only two complaints are, first, I didn't really understand the portion once she had won the battle. Does she have the power to jump through time? If so, she's never had that ability before. If not, then that was an extremely impressive illusion. The second, if you're going to quote something, as a writer and an editor, make sure you quote it correctly. Especially if you're quoting something as important as the bible. It is written in the issue as "Judge not, that ye be judged" which doesn't make any sense, the actual quote is "Judge not, lest ye be judged."
Power Girl #26 (DC Comics): I read an interview with the writer Matthew Sturges where he talked about writing this issue. I was on the fence at first but I had to read it because it was a Power Girl fan convention and everyone was dressed as Power Girl I thought "Oh, this could be pretty fun." Good grief was I wrong. Matthew Sturges wrote the most boring story I've read in a long time. I can deal with bad, but bad and boring? Sturges has earned a big strike on my writer's list. He tries to create a story of female empowerment which fell flatter than fois gras under a steam press. Powergirl's personality was completely dull and lifeless, not only that but throughout the entirety of the comic Sturges gives her this air of a complete snob who gives less than a damn about people she comes off as snubbing everyone and being completely stuck up. The secondary characters weren't believable nor were they likeable. The powergirl cosplayers were written as toned down cliches of fangirl cosplayers with dialogue that came straight out of the movie clueless (which apparently is apropos for this writer) and the villian was a complete joke that inevitably had no real believable motivation. Sturges was so proud of himself for writing a "girl-power" story but he just ended up making Kara look at worst completely lifeless and at best completely unlikable and it shows that Sturges has no talent as a writer. I was at a fundraiser recently and won a copy of "The Cat in the Hat Comes Back" and honestly, its has better writing than this issue of Power Girl. Also, don't get me wrong, I love PG, she's my favorite DC comics female and I hate that she's losing her solo series. However, I also hate that this is the best I get in her solo series, almost everything past Conner and Palmiotti has been kind of a let down but that's a discussion for another day.
X-men #14 & #15 and Uncanny X-men #540 & #541 (Marvel Comics): I'm So unhappy with the X-men title right now, it started with vampires, moved to a Dark Beast saga which was fairly weak but I will grant that it was better than the vampire thing, and now this evolutionary story which has made no sense and decided to randomly put Emma Frost in a Psyche Ward. My memory may be fuzzy but I don't recall her ever being in a Psyche Ward. The only good thing I will say about this Title is it really shows that Cyclops is one hell of a tactician even in the most unusual circumstances. The problem being that few of the stories have made much sense. Especially this evolutionary one which has loads of flashbacks and lots of movement in few panels and even if you were to fix these problems you would still be left with a sub par plot that seems awfully weak. Super monkey's want to kill all humans and we must stop them! Oh No! As for Uncanny, I don't actually have a problem with a good portion of this, the only problem I have to point out is that I hate the "Fear Itself" company crossover. "Lets give every badguy we can think of a Mjolnir That will perk things up. I don't like it at all and thus far the stories have proved rather lackluster. The other thing that happened is they talked alot about Magik and she doesn't appear much in uncanny, I believe she mostly shows up in new mutants so I can only assume they were referencing something that happened in another series such as that and I had no idea what they were talking about unless it had to do with the big hope arch that appeared last year where she went AWOL....again. The absolute best moment of the two comics was when they let the mayor into emma's psychic confrence room and the mayor asks why Emma gets a throne, emma casually and haughtily replys that she created the room and she can sit in whatever she wants. I snickered. Also, Emma looks hot in a cowboy hat.
Well boys and girls, I hope you've finished off your drinks because it is time for me to continue my philanthropic duties in the world. I hope you leave just a little bit more enlightened than when you entered.
Ciao,
Dr Elitist Von Nerddenkaiser. PhD, MD, RSVP CSI and MS Corps
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